We're only human
I started this site in March with this goal of keeping up with it. I tend to set goals like that knowing this disease comes in waves and when it hits, it knocks me down. When I put this together it was at the beginning of quarantine and wasn't really sure what was going to happen in the next few months. I lost my job, which I feel was a blessing because it's given me time to rest and try different alternative treatments. The funny thing is that I had a pending claim to be given permission to work from home and then a month later we were all forced to work from home anyway. The pandemic assistance has given me some wiggle room to be able to treat this disease the way I want to since it's actually more than what I was being paid at my job.
I gave up all hope on doctors. None of them know anything about Lyme + co-infections. They keep sending me around in a circle of doctors who keep performing the same tests and finding nothing, saying "my labs are normal." You know how much I love that one. My labs are very much not normal. These are my current labs below. Clearly my body isn't in good shape.
Lyme & co-infections will cause these test results. These doctors are not taught anything besides prescribing two weeks of antibiotics for tick borne illness, so they have absolutely no idea how to treat it. They are also not taught about wellness. They are taught to diagnose and treat illness, not how to prevent you from getting sick.
It's frustrating because I have to be in control of my illness and getting better. I rely on others who have suffered or are still suffering to find answers. Without social media I would still be confused & struggling. I do not have the guidance of any medical professionals at this point since after more than a decade they can't help me.
I have a ton of emotions lately and it's really hard to manage them all. The leading cause of death for people with Lyme disease is suicide because there is literally no help out there, especially if you do not have the money or emotional support. If you know of anyone suffering from this illness and you have the means offer them money or purchase some of their supplements, alternative therapies, etc. My IV therapy the other day was $250 for one session and that was cheaper than usual, due to less people going since the pandemic started.
I miss my old self, my stamina and energy. Of course a lot of who I've become, I do love. I feel I have evolved so much as a person. I've healed a lot of hurt that I had and it's made it easier to concentrate on healing this illness as best as I can. I won't lie and say I didn't fall off with treating recently. The state of the world has been a lot to deal with but I believe I've been given this voice for a reason and I will use it as much as I can.